|
Web Resources
|
Guten morgen from Germany! By now, you may have
figured out the answer to last week's clue: We will
travel 5,000 miles to a city for which 1989 was a
watershed year. That, my friends, was the year the
wall came down in Berlin. If you're up for making the
transatlantic flight in style but for a relatively low price,
then you'll want to join me on my trip on Air Berlin. In
fact, right now, they have deals to Germany, flying economy, from $298
R/T*; business class starts at $1099 E/W.
Looking for something a little different? Join former
Playboy cover girl Sarah Kozer this week as she takes
us on a fitness vacation in
Hawaii. Either way, you're in for a treat! Also, we
have the skinny on the airline that's beginning to charge for
a bleeping middle seat and a handy frequent flyer fee chart that
shows the airlines' mileage charges.
AMBER AIRPLANE
It's amazing how many people still ask me about my ex-girlfriend Amber Airplane. It's been four years since we broke up, but I still get emails about her and sometimes, random people approach me at the airport and make inquiries. Well, here's the scoop: shortly after our relationship lost its wings, Amber moved out of California and last month, she gave birth to a healthy 8-lbs, 3-oz boy named Ayden James. Congratulations to her and her family!
THE TODAY SHOW
The travel business is constantly changing so I try to watch as many travel segments as I can to stay in the loop. Well, you should have seen my face when I stumbled upon this clip from The
Today Show. Travel expert Nilou Motamed was talking about insider travel websites when a screen shot popped up of JohnnyJet.com. My ears perked up and my eyes grew wide in anticipation but I ended up getting bumped from the segment as they ran out of time. Ugh! If you want to see it, you have to watch carefully at 2:59 into the clip.
TIP: RESCUING A WATERLOGGED BLACKBERRY
Like so many people, I've become enormously dependent on my BlackBerry. I stupidly got water on it recently. The screen instantly began blinking and then the phone went completely dead. A shrieking voice that I didn't even know existed inside me began berating me. Yikes! All my contacts were gone, I was leaving for Germany in a few hours and I hadn't backed up the phone since I got it over a year ago. The first thing I did was kick myself for not practicing what I preach. Next, I did an online search to find out what to do if you get your BlackBerry wet. One of the suggestions was to put your water logged BlackBerry in uncooked rice. I did that and put the battery in separately. Sure enough, within two hours my baby was back to normal! Gotta love simple, inexpensive tricks like that. Hopefully this will encourage you to backup your BlackBerry like I just did and teach you a little trick, too.
WHAT A BONEHEAD!
Man, I could have received two Bonehead Awards within the space of four hours. This one would have taken the gold. Here's the story: When I received my itinerary from Air Berlin via email, I had to think twice as to what time I was departing as it was listed in military time. Why can't they just list times using both clocks? In America, the 24-hour clock is not widely used unless you're in the military or working for the fire or police departments. So, all along, I thought my flight to Düsseldorf was departing at 5:35pm. But as I was finishing up some work around 2pm, I decided to double-check my schedule. Imagine my horror when I saw that the departure time was actually 15:35. 15:35?! Holy cow! I felt a cold sweat as I realized that I was scheduled to depart at 3:35pm, not 5:35pm. Like any insane person, I panicked!
A MAD DASH!
I didn't have enough time to call the airline to confirm, or even log on to their website. I quickly grabbed the phone and begged my neighbor to take me to the airport IMMEDIATELY; I didn't even have enough time to call a taxi. Fortunately, I was already packed, though usually I wait until the very last second. Also, I only live 12 minutes from LAX but my neighbor still drove too slowly for my liking! To make matters worse, we ran into unusual traffic. There was a mass police escort surrounding a group of
runners carrying what I guess was the Olympic flame. I thought I must have been on some kind of bloopers show because there had been nothing in the news about the flame coming back to America (it was here months ago), let alone any news of it being in my hometown.
DUH!
When we finally cruised past them and arrived at the airport, I ran as fast as I could to the Air Berlin check-in counter at the packed Tom Bradley International Terminal. Running there, I contemplated my options; if I missed this flight, my entire trip would likely be canceled since I needed to be there the next day and Air Berlin only flies four times a week from LAX. They don't have any codeshare partners and I doubted that they would put me on another airline since it was my stupid mistake. Boy, what a fool I must have looked like when I ran up to the counter, huffing and puffing with beads of sweat running down my forehead. I was stoked to see agents still behind the desk and of course, there was no line by this point. I apologized for being late as I handed her my passport. The calm agent looked up my record and informed me that I wasn't late at all. In fact, I was so early, I was one of the first passengers to arrive. Duh! Part of me was relieved but another part of me was ticked for being such a bonehead. I fired up my laptop to see how I could have made the mistake. What happened is that I had accidentally read the time for my connecting flight from Berlin to Düsseldorf, which departed at 15:35. What an idiot!
LOUNGE ACCESS
So there I was at the airport, earlier than I'd ever been in my life, for any flight. I was so early, I even contemplated going back home to finish my chores but feared that my heart couldn't take any more madness for one day. Instead, I went to the lounge; Air Berlin uses the SkyTeam lounge even though they aren't partnered with them. I caught up on my emails and took a hot shower. I love taking a hot shower before getting on a long redeye flight. It helps me relax and feel a bit fresher when I arrive at my destination. NOTE: The security line was really long but for those flying business or first class, there's a dedicated line that isn't clear until you get to the front. So instead of waiting like most people, go up to the front and scout things out.
AIR BERLIN
If you don't travel to Europe often, you may never have heard of Air Berlin. I was surprised to learn that a former Pan Am pilot founded Air Berlin in 1978 but its name didn't really get out there (at least to my knowledge) until 2006, when it began acquiring other carriers. Most people knew it as a low-fare carrier that flew in and around Europe. That perception is beginning to change because last year, they took over Düsseldorf-based LTU. LTU was a German charter that served many international destinations. That deal makes Air Berlin Germany's second largest airline and they are giving Lufthansa a run for its money for the leisure market. FYI: The overseas international flights operate as Air Berlin/LTU since they haven't received the final government approvals to fly under Air Berlin. The U.S. airports they serve are New York's JFK, Miami, LAX and Fort Myers and all flights go in and out of Düsseldorf.
FYI: Air Berlin is the best low-cost airline in Europe, according to the latest Skytrax World Airline Awards, which also saw Singapore Airlines, BA and Virgin Atlantic take home prizes. Click here for more.
VWs ON THE PLANE
I was so early that I was able to watch the Air Berlin aircraft arrive and deplane. It was cool because it was the first time I'd ever seen a commercial aircraft unload cars. Yes, I watched two or three brand new Volkswagens emerge from the underbelly of the A330 plane. Milling around the gate, I noticed, about 10 minutes before boarding, that they brought out boxes of magazines and newspapers for passengers to grab free of charge; it was a bit chaotic so I stayed away. When I got on board, I was able to make the cherished left turn into business class. I assume my assigned seat was broken because I was asked to switch from 5C to 3C. 3A was also out of commission, which was perfect for me because that meant I had an open seat next to me. Perfect! I had as much space as some hotel rooms.
IN-FLIGHT AMENITIES
I wasn't concerned that a couple of the seats were broken. I see it all the time and the plane was brand spanking new ... or at least it appeared to be. I forgot to write down the serial number to look up actual age of the aircraft but I'm pretty sure it was just a couple of years old -- if that. Each seat in business class had a 10-inch screen with 14 channels of audio and nine channels of video, including the live map. The movies weren't on-demand so that was a bit of a bummer, plus the fact that the seats didn't have power ports and we were given cheap plastic headsets. In business class, you'd expect noise cancelation headphones but to make up for it, they did offer a fine amenity kit that had socks, an eye shade, moisturizer, lip balm, a shoe horn, spritzer and stickers to alert the crew if you were hungry or not. They also handed out slippers like those found bedside at some luxury hotels. That was a nice touch; this way, passengers don't have to fumble to put their shoes on before going into the germ-infested bathrooms. Hopefully, you know this by now: Never ever go into an airplane bathroom with just your socks or worse, in bare feet -- no matter how new the planes are. FYI: Although Air Berlin's business class seats are fairly comfortable, they don't go completely flat. But by the end of the year, they plan to re-outfit their entire business class with flat beds and state-of-the-art entertainment systems ... or so I'm told.
FLIGHT ATTENDANTS
The flight attendants (FAs) were attentive and worked diligently for the first few hours. Then, like on most U.S. and European airlines, they disappeared and were on call until breakfast was served about two hours out. I've heard a few reasons why they all seem to do this. One is that their contracts, which the labor unions negotiate, require it. The other is that passengers don't want to be disturbed anyways, because they need to sleep on overnight flights. No matter what the reason is, I think there should be a happy medium. I think a flight attendant should walk quietly down the aisle every 15 minutes or so to see if anyone needs anything because I don't like to hit the call button. Amber Airplane, a former flight attendant, instilled this nugget into my little brain: Never hit the call button unless you want to get on the flight crew's bad side.
To give you a rundown of the service, I recorded my flight in some serious detail. What can I say? I was bored since my laptop didn't have any juice. OK, here's how my flight shook out:
LAX-DUS ON AIR BERLIN FLIGHT 3531
Boarding began a little late (5:20pm) for the 5:35pm departure. I think unloading the VWs caused the delay.
Shortly after I took my seat, I was greeted with the choice of a pre-takeoff drink ... OJ, water or champagne.
5:45pm We push back from the gate.
6:01pm Airborne! Germany here I come, baby!
6:09pm Seatbelt sign goes off, FAs pass out duty-free and I use the loo … I drank a ton of water in the lounge.
6:12pm FAs pass out menus; here's a scan.
6:16pm Piping hot refresher towels are passed out. I notice a smoking hot young FA who must be working economy, quickly pass through our cabin. She looks at me but doesn't smile. It was then I noticed that she was wearing a red belt that had Air Berlin written on it. What do you know? All the FAs are wearing one.
6:18pm FA picked up the towel that I just used to wipe my face first, then my hands and then the seat controls to remove any nasty germs from the previous passenger.
6:20pm FA passes out the cheap headsets.
6:26pm Out come the amenity kits (see above for contents).
6:30pm FA comes down the aisle with bags of peanuts and a German party mix. I'm starving so I gobble them both up.
6:31pm Drink cart makes its first of many appearances. I notice on the map we are now over Vega$.
6:36pm Bottles of spring water and a plastic cup are handed out to each passenger.
6:52pm Placemats are placed down and I am just raring for my food as my stomach grumbles for more.
6:56pm The cool male FA (who happens to be on my flight home as well) takes the main course order: chicken breast, beef Stroganoff, salmon, gnocchi.
6:57pm Dinner is served! Hallelujah!
7:01pm Drink cart again.
7:06pm More bread.
7:14pm Tasty Prosciutto with melon and antipasti plate are collected.
7:20pm Hot meal is served; I chose the beef stroganoff. It was okay.
7:21pm Drink cart again. Man, the Germans love to drink. I'm the only one in the cabin who's just drinking water and the only non-Deustch-speaking passenger so I look like a dumb American.
7:32pm Cheese and grapes are served. The breadbasket makes an appearance again.
7:40pm All trays are collected.
7:46pm Dessert. I tell myself I'm just going to take a taste because my belly is getting larger by the day. Besides, a strawberry cheese cake on chocolate sauce doesn't sound very appetizing (yeah right!) but I ate every bite of it. Oh look, we're over Casper, WY.
7:52pm The male FA calls me by my surname and asks if I want any duty free. Uh, I don't think so but thanks for asking.
7:53pm Dinner tray is cleared.
7:53:30pm I get up when the hot FA walks to the front of the plane. I decide I will catch her on the way back, which I do. She was friendly but not that friendly. I decide to tell her my German jokes. I realize now that they are only well received with non-Germans. When I ask her if she knows the word for bra in German, she spits out something other than what I know: stop 'em from floppin'. I spare her the German word for constipation: far from poopin'.
8:07pm Seatbelt sign goes on. There's turbulence as we cross over the Nebraska / South Dakota border.
8:08pm I decide it's a good time to catch some zzz's so I put on my eye mask and ear plugs, remove the soft blanket from the plastic wrapping and discover it has a foot pouch, which is very cute and snuggly. That sounds a little feminine, doesn't it? Before I close the window shade, I turn my watch nine hours ahead. FYI: It stayed light pretty much the whole flight since it's summertime and we took the northern route.
8:50am I wake up. I slept a bit but it was mostly in twilight. Man, I need to start taking melatonin or some kind of sleeping aid because this all-natural stuff is not working for me.
11:15am FAs come around with freshly squeezed OJ. I'm dehydrated so I down it in one gulp.
11:18am Another round of OJ. I take my time on this one.
11:25am Hot towels.
11:34am Breakfast (deli meat, bread, fruit) and drinks served at the same time.
1:12pm We touch down ahead of schedule. Total flight time: 10 hours and 11 minutes.
NOTE: Here are some tips for surviving a long haul flight.
DÜSSELDORF AIRPORT
We deplaned using the plane stairs. I pay attention this time as I carry both my bags down the stairs; I tripped in Kona a few months ago. I was one of the first people on the shuttle bus to customs but one of the last to get out. I was cornered. It was hot out and the bus took a while to get to our drop-off point, which entailed walking up three flights of stairs to get inside the terminal. The walk was surprisingly depressing as the Düsseldorf airport is really nice. The customs line was long but it moved quickly, taking about 10 minutes. I transferred to the B Terminal, which was as simple as following the red line painted on the floor. I had to go through security again to catch my connecting flight. Laptop out, shoes stay on. Ha! But the machines caught some liquid in my bag, something U.S. security never does (except in Fort Lauderdale).
DÜSSELDORF TO BERLIN
The B Terminal in Düsseldorf is nothing like the modern A Terminal. It's not nearly as nice and what really bummed me out is that it was smoky from the people smoking in the smoking section of the cafés. Smoking sections don't work. Smokers need to go outside or smoking should be banned -- in my opinion. I grabbed a bottle of water from one of the shops and it cost me a whopping 2.95 euro. That’s $4.61 USD! Boarding for Air Berlin Flight 6444 to Berlin was quick. They asked that rows 12-23 board first but they don't enforce it like they do in the U.S. The big difference is that not many passengers, if any, had more than one bag … and they were all tiny. Although overhead storage space wasn't vast, there was plenty of room on the 737-300 plane. The plane was packed too. I was wedged in seat 3F, a window seat. There wasn't enough space for me to work on my laptop if I had wanted to but I was tired like most of the folks. I was just happy it was a 55-minute flight. For a low-fare carrier, I was surprised that they offered free drinks and a snack -- either a hot dog-like thing, a candy bar or a tasty Manner Original Neapolitaner wafer. Mmm! I was happy to have a window seat because I love staring out the window at a place I have never been. When we touched down at Berlin-Tegel Airport, guess what plane I spotted? C-32A!
George Bush was in town and it appeared he had just arrived as all three of his helicopters (including Marine One) were right next to the plane. FYI: Berlin has three airports:
Tegel,
Tempelhof
and Berlin-Schönefeld but in 2011, they will be closed for the new Berlin-Brandenburg International Airport.
AIR BERLIN SPECIAL
Perfect timing! Check out these Germany sale fares on Air Berlin from $298 R/T*. They've also just launched a summer business class fare sale and to go from JFK to Germany is $1,099 one-way; $2,198 return, plus taxes and valid for travel now until August 31st. Click here for that deal.
CARBON OFFSET
I realize what airplane emissions are doing to the environment so instead of giving privately, each week I will list the amount of money I spend for a carbon offset. This may not be as good as not flying at all but let's face it: the plane is still taking off whether I'm on it or not. And my name is Johnny Jet not Johnny Jogger. Los Angeles to Berlin is 11,648 miles and a carbon offset from CarbonFund.org is just $ 20.97 roundtrip.
VIDEO
Sorry! No video this week but we'll have a great one for you next week. As always, all of the Johnny Jet videos ever made are available for your viewing pleasure on YouTube.
NEXT WEEK
Next week we do Berlin Johnny Jet style ... whatever that is!
*PLEASE tell us what you think of this week's newsletter!
Note:
This trip was sponsored by
Air Berlin.
Copyright 2008 JohnnyJet, Inc. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.
|
Pictures From
The Trip

Check-In At LAX
|
|

Amber Airplane
|
|

The Today Show
|
|

Runner's Carrying The Flame & Blocking Traffic
|
|

Long Security Line
|
|

Air Berlin A330
|
|

Boarding Air Berlin
|
|

Business Class Seat
|
|

Business Class Cabin
|
|

Cheap Headsets
|
|

Welcome Drink
|
|

Nice Slippers!
|
|

Amenity Bag
|
|

Party Mix
|
|

Appetizer
|
|

Beef Stroganoff
|
|

Fruit and Cheese Plate
|
|

Dessert
|
|

Flight Plan
|
|

Breakfast
|
|

We Are Getting Close
|
|

Real Close!
|
|

I'm Back in Europe Baby!
|
|

Dusseldorf Airport
|
|

Deplaning
|
|

Stairs To Customs
|
|

Follow The Red Line
|
|

Terminal B
|
|

These Two Airlines Merged
|
|

Berlin Here I Come!
|
|

Taking Off From DUS
|
|

Dusseldorf
|
|

Plane Shadow
|
|

In-Flight Snack
|
|

She's Daydreaming Too
|
|

Getting Close to Berlin
|
|

Real Close!
|
|

C-32A
|
|

Berlin Tegel Airport
|
|

NEXT WEEK
|
|