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Happy Halloween! I just landed in the least scary place — the great state of Hawaii. To get here, I traveled almost halfway around the world. I flew from Germany to England on Germanwings, London to Los Angeles on MAXjet, then L.A. to Honolulu on Hawaiian Airlines. Phew! If you're up for some stories about my travels then sit back and enjoy this week's story. If hours of globetrotting until I finally descend upon Hawaii for a few days just ain't your thing, you may want to join my sister Georgie Jet on her travels. She will be continuing her exploration of Belgium, this week in the wonderful Wallonia countryside.
GERMANWINGS
My journey began with an early morning, 5:40am taxi pick-up from the Cologne Marriott. The Autobahn was surprisingly crowded at that hour but that didn't stop my crazy driver from putting the pedal to the metal and hitting a speed of 170 km per hour (105mph). We made it to the airport in just 12 minutes. I was flying Germanwings, one of Germany's low-fare carriers. Germanwings flies 24 new airbus aircrafts (A319/A320) to over 50 European destinations from Germany. As with all low-fare carriers, in order to secure the best deals, it's best to buy tickets as far in advance as possible or jump immediately on sale fares. You can sign up for email alerts to be notified. That's what I did when I scheduled one of Germanwings' three flights from Cologne into London-Stansted (STN) airport just 30 miles north of central London. Stansted is very popular with low-fare carriers because the landing fees are much cheaper than those at the major airports.
STRICT BAGGAGE ALLOWANCE
Germanwings has check-in counters for each destination. Only one person was in front of me in line and the agents moved quickly, especially considering the strict luggage rules. Most low-fare carriers tend to be ultra-stern about baggage allowance. Each Germanwings passenger (except those under two years old) can check baggage up to a combined weight of 20kg or 44lbs. If your luggage weight is over, be prepared to pay 7 euro ($10) per kilogram (2.2lbs), up to a maximum of 50kg (110lbs). For more information, visit GermanWings.com.
NO RESERVATION
The agent I was dealing with was very friendly but said she couldn't find the reservation that I had made online two weeks prior, paying 80 euro for my ticket. She directed me to the customer service counter where they had me boot up my computer so I could show them the email confirmation I had neglected to print. Turns out, stupid me doesn't understand enough German to know that my reservation had not, in fact, been completed but rather, had been put on hold due to a problem with my credit card. (Maybe I should take my own advice and sign up for language classes through FluencyNow.com!) Anyhow, I shrugged in disbelief but I knew I was screwed. It was my own fault; I should have followed up, or at the very least ... booked my ticket on the English site. Luckily, there were still seats available and when I asked how much a one-way ticket was going to set me back, I held my breath. I got lucky. Just 150 euro. Close call.
COLOGNE AIRPORT
The Köln-Bonn (CGN) airport is very chic. Everything is modern and it offers up plenty of options for shopping and eating. The security line was quite long, but took just 12 minutes to conquer. The screening process requires passengers to put everything into containers for examination, including passports and tickets. The agent working the X-ray screen must have had a late night because he was seriously falling asleep. Not very comforting ... so I ratted his German arse out and he was removed.
BOARDING
I sped through passport control and waited at the gate for the shuttle bus to the plane. The boarding process for Germanwings flights is similar to that of Southwest Airlines; neither assigns seats. The earlier you check in (beginning two hours ahead of departure), the sooner you can board to get the seat you want. Since they board using two doors of the airplane and have a one-bag carry-on rule, they can load the plane in record time. Flight time was only an hour, so I didn't need to purchase any of the on-board food or drink. They charge for everything, including water. I scored an empty row and was able to nap for a good portion of the flight. Stared out the window for the rest.
STANSTED AIRPORT
It was a good thing my Germanwings flight was on time because my MAXjet flight was scheduled to depart less than two hours after my arrival. Due to the fact that Germanwings doesn't have any interline agreements (an agreement whereby passengers can check their bags all the way to their final destination), I needed to go through passport control at Stansted, grab my checked luggage, then check-in for my MAXjet flight. Despite all of that, the good news is that I cleared customs in one minute (no line) and baggage appeared five minutes later.
MAXJET LOUNGE
There was no line at the MAXjet counter and the agent was friendly. He gave me (and all of the other passengers) a fast-track pass for security and the lounge. This saved me from waiting in a long queue at security. With all of England's tight security measures, I was surprised that they didn't make passengers take off their shoes for screening. The free lounge offers a bright, comfortable hideout from the drab gate area. On top of that, they provide lots of free food and drink. It had everything you could want (including free Internet) but no bathrooms ... they are located down the hall. BTW: The duty-free area in the main hall offers a wide variety of shopping but once you get to your gate area (which requires a tram-ride) it's very lame. There are just two dirty stores so be sure to do your shopping before you go to your gate.
FLYING MAXJET
I wrote about MAXjet in full detail a few weeks back (here's the link), so I won't go into further detail. Because MAXjet only has four planes, they tend to be late and not surprisingly, ours was delayed by an hour. No one seemed to mind (credit the plush lounge) but the MAXjet folks didn't do a great job informing people. Instead, they just kept telling us we'd be boarding shortly even though they knew we wouldn't be since the plane had just landed and needed to be cleaned. Had they been upfront about the wait time, I would have ridden the tram back to the main terminal to spend my leftover pounds.
The 767 plane looked newer than the one I had come out on. While using the lavatory, I discovered that Turkish Airlines had previously operated this plane. The bathroom door gave it away ... it had Arabic writing. What's interesting is that the vacant sign was highlighted in red so I stood there for 15 minutes thinking it was occupied. Weird how we are trained by colors. Just like the flight over, the flight attendants were very friendly and even let me use the outlet in the back of the plane to charge my computer. I wish the seats had power ports.
INTRODUCING: THE WORLD'S STRONGEST MAN
Only 59 of the plane's 89 seats were taken so I was able to move around at will. I first sat across from one of the world's strongest men, Terry Hollands. The man is a monster. He's 6'6" and 400 lbs! He barely fit in the business class seat. His arm was seriously bigger than my thigh and I'm not scrawny! He turned out to be a nice, quiet, shy chap but his feet smelled really bad. If he reads this, I'm going to get a royal ass whooping! I tried to spray some cologne on his bare feet but the man didn't sleep and every time I bent over to accomplish my mission (slyly pretending to tie my shoes) he would look at me. His feet were monsters too and I'm sure that to wash those big dawgs thoroughly, he'd have to run them through a car wash. Mission failed, I grabbed my belongings and went to the back of the plane. After the smooth 11-hour flight, I did approach him and wish him luck for the Anaheim world championship competition.
I also told him in an excited tone that this was the one time I wish we had a terrorist on the plane, because between us, we'd have kicked some serious ass! He looked at my with a blank stare and there was an awkward silence, my joke going over like a lead balloon. So I backtracked and said, "OK, YOU would have kicked some serious ass and I would have really enjoyed watching you tear the cowardly bastard apart." He cracked a smile and chuckled, giving me a high-five with his bear-sized paw. Ouch. Even that hurt.
AIR FRANCE LOST LUGGAGE
Update: A couple months ago, I complained that Air France lost my luggage for two days and that the 100-euro allowance they coughed up didn't come close to covering my expenses for clothes in Cannes. Well, I sent Air France a letter with my receipts (I photocopied everything before sending them), itemizing my $437-worth of expenses and to my surprise, I received a check for the full amount! Kudos to Air France. I love that airline!
CAMERA
And speaking of getting money back: Do you remember my Best Buy tirade? I admit, I was on a roll, ranting about their sub-par customer service and their refusal to fix my Panasonic Lumix FX01 wide-angle camera. Well, I'm pretty tenacious. I didn't give up and sent letters to both the Best Buy and Panasonic corporate offices. Guess what? They both made good, too. Panasonic contacted me immediately and agreed to fix my camera. Best Buy agreed to refund my money. When it rains, it pours.
HEADED TO HAWAII
With two cameras in hand, I was pretty stoked to be going to Hawaii! I haven't been there in four years. I used to go all the time when I worked as an admissions counselor at Marymount College in Palos Verdes. I was also excited to be flying Hawaiian Airlines for the first time across the Pacific. When I called to arrange an aisle seat, I was sure that I'd be put on hold, then told that they don't assign seats, like so many other airlines these days. But just the opposite happened.
CHECKING BAGS
I arrived at LAX two hours before my flight. Check-in was a breeze, taking only five minutes -- and most passengers were using the self-serve kiosks. You've just gotta love when the question, "how many surfboards will you be checking?" appears on-screen. If that doesn't get you all pumped up, what will? Unfortunately, at most terminals at LAX, when you check a surfboard or bag, they need to be brought to the TSA, which is a separate and typically much longer, slower line than the airline check-in. I still don't know why the TSA can't just allow the airlines to put checked bags on the carousel, like they do in most airports.
HAWAIIAN AIRLINES UPGRADE
There was no line for security. My flight was departing at 8:50am and by 8:15am, ninety-five percent of the passengers had already boarded. I was number one on the upgrade list and the agents informed me that I had a shot since one person still hadn't checked in. At 8:20am, the designated time that seats are released, my name was called over the PA system. I knew what that meant so I threw my arms in the air like an NFL referee signaling a touchdown. First of all, flying to Hawaii in any class of service is a special thing. But getting upgraded to
first --
now that's just plain fantasy! Last-minute upgrades go for $369 one-way. That's not a bad deal but if booked in advance on Hawaiian's easy-to-use website (HawaiianAir.com), it's even cheaper. Surprisingly, Hawaiian Air has some reasonably priced last-minute fares to the island in the off-season. I just priced out a trip and found a one-way coach ticket three days from now, for
$232 in economy; the first class fare was $654.
SECONDARY SECURITY SCREENING SELECTION
When they printed out my new boarding pass, the dreaded ol' SSSS showed up. The four S's stand for Secondary Security Screening Selection and meant that I'd been randomly chosen to undergo additional inspection. Even though I had already cleared security, I had to run my excited behind back to the TSA so I could get screened a second time and get a TSA stamp of approval. The agent was super-cool and just patted me down and didn't go through my bag. I really had to run because Hawaiian Airlines really strives for being on time and although there were still 15 minutes before departure time, they were closing the airplane door. No wonder Hawaiian Airlines was America's #1 on-time airline from 2004 to 2006 and is on track to win that honor again this year. The statistics are according to the Department of Transportation Consumer Report.
ON BOARD HAWAIIAN AIRLINES
I was assigned seat 1H, a bulkhead aisle seat in the navy blue interior cabin. The seats were the same as MAXjet but didn't recline as far back and didn't provide as much legroom. Entertainment options were also the same as MAXjet; portable Digiplayers with on-demand movies, TV shows and music and educational information about Hawaii, including how not to damage the reefs. In first class, Digiplayers are doled out for free but in coach, they have to be rented for $15. In coach, they also sell snacks and only take credit cards for payment, not cash. But don't worry: the meal service is free as well as the in-flight movie.
FLIGHT ATTENDANTS
The flight attendants' uniforms weren't as colorful as the plane's tail ... I love the Hawaiian Air logo. The men wore white aloha shirts with a dark purple design. The women wore conservative purple dresses. They did an excellent job and I was really impressed with the overall service (including keeping the bathroom clean). Not only did they frequently walk around the cabin, filling up glasses or removing dishes, but the two guys working up front were just cool people who love their job. Did you know that many of the flight attendants fly to Hawaii and back in the same day? Talk about a long workday.
FOOD IN FIRST CLASS
Before takeoff, the flight attendants came around with a choice of champagne or passion/guava juice. I love this sweet juice. After takeoff came hot linen refresher towels, mixed nuts with dried cranberries and pineapple, followed by the meal service. The food in first class was very good but not what I imagined. I was disappointed when I saw the menu; there was nothing Hawaiian about it. They were offering a deep-dish mixed vegetable frittata, antipasto with coronets of salami, grilled eggplant, fresh mozzarella and oven-roasted tomatoes, or crab bread pudding. What's that all about? I was sure I was going to be eating some of Chef Sam Choy's BBQ baby back ribs with a hint of coconut. Or Roy Yamaguchi's grilled Hawaiian satay skewers. But they did offer a soft tasty roll and fresh fruit (pineapple, kiwi, blueberries and strawberries) and just prior to landing, a hot chocolate chip cookie to ease my disappointment.
ALOHA
Overall, the five-hour, 23-minute flight to Honolulu was a dream. We took off and landed on time. And about 30 minutes before touchdown, the scenery really started to get good. I could feel my excitement rising. TIP: Even though you're headed to Hawaii, bring a sweatshirt because the plane's air conditioning was on high and the soft, navy blue fleece blankets they provided weren't wrapped in plastic, so who knows how clean they were.
VIDEO
Sorry! No video this week but we'll have a great one for you next week. As always, all of the Johnny Jet videos ever made are available for your viewing pleasure on YouTube.
NEXT WEEK
Here today, gone to Maui. Stay tuned.
Happy Travels,
Johnny Jet
*PLEASE tell us what you think of this week's newsletter!
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Note:
Flights were provided by
MaxJet.com &
Wailea Beach Villas
Copyright 2007 JohnnyJet, Inc. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.