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DID YOU KNOW? The island of Taha'a has a population of about 5,000 and there are just two hotels and about 10 bed and breakfasts.

TOUR OF TAHA'A
When we got off the shuttle boat at Tapu'amu wharf on Taha'a, a few local tour guides were waiting. Two couples had arranged for a tour through the hotel while we had made our arrangements privately (it's cheaper). The hotel concierge was sure to tell us that they don't recommend booking anything on your own. I thought it was just so they made a commission. However, they might have had a point because it didn't meet their standards. Later in the day, the couples who had taken a hotel-arranged tour told us they absolutely loved it but ours was just okay. Our driver from Vaipoe Tours (tel: 79 26 01) was very nice and knowledgeable. He was waiting for us with his open-air Land Rover that had fitted, flower-patterned covers (which kept falling off) over the long bench seats. He asked if we wanted to sit up front with him or in the back. We figured we'd go for the authentic tour and sit in the back even though it's probably less safe. He showed us on a map where we were going, told us all the history and stopped at every different tree or bush and pointed out the different fruits (mangoes, papayas, avocadoes, grapefruit, breadfruit, jackfruit, coconut, soursop); flowers (hibiscus, gardenia, heliconias, flamingo, orchids); and types of trees (teak, rosewood). If nothing else, it was a very informative tour.



GROCERY STORE
About 10 minutes into the tour, our guide asked us if we wanted anything from the grocery store. Of course, we wanted to buy some cold drinks and check out what their grocery stores look like. I loved the fact that they sell fresh baguettes and what's even cooler is that our guide later pointed out what looked like long narrow mailboxes in front of most houses. But they're not mailboxes, they're really breadboxes (long enough to fit a baguette) so that fresh bread can be delivered each day. Too cool! He explained that most stores are owned by the Chinese and that 80% of all businesses in French Polynesia are owned by the Chinese as well. I'm not sure if that's true. It seems an awfully high percentage considering I don't think I saw one Chinese person the whole trip.

VANILLA PLANTATION
Taha'a is often referred to as the Vanilla Island since it's responsible for about 70% of Polynesia's vanilla production. It's estimated that they produce 25 tons a year. We visited a vanilla farm owned by a Danish man and his wife. He tours guests around while she manages the store. Being part Danish, the first question I asked him was if he missed Denmark. He said that when he gets homesick, he sticks his head in the freezer and that does the trick. Funny guy, eh? He showed us step-by-step how the precious vanilla orchid grows and is cultivated. It's not an easy process and requires some human intervention. I videotaped it all using my FlipVideo but it's not easy to post the file online. Once I figure it out, I will insert a link so you can see exactly how the black gold of Polynesia is created. Like a good tourist, I did buy some vanilla (600 CPF = $6.42 USD a bottle). I passed on the vanilla coffee, tea, perfume, soap and candles ... But I did learn that you can make your own vanilla extract by just getting 20 beans and putting them in a bottle with rum. All the restaurants do it since it's so much cheaper.

RUM AND COKE
Speaking of rum ... When it was time to go, our guide was hanging out under the cool shade with a few locals in the open-air store. He was drinking Coke in a glass, which I thought was too civilized. Then I remembered that he'd bought a bottle of rum with his bottle of Coke during our earlier stop at the grocery store. He gave the rum to the Danish guy but since his eyes looked a little red, I think he must have cracked it open while we were on the tour. I'm not 100% sure that that was the case but I would bet the house he did. It didn't sit well that there was even a chance our guide and driver was drinking while on the job. I realize that there are barely any cars on the road (there are actually more boats than cars here), but that's hardly the point. It's not cool to drink and drive under any circumstances.

BLACK PEARL FARM
When we stopped at our guide's small, company-owned pearl farm and he took a leak in front of the truck on the side of the road, I was then pretty certain he'd been drinking. Their pearl farm wasn't a working one so it was a joke compared to the one I'd seen in Fiji and other ones on the island. He began explaining the long, boring process and all I could think about was how to end the tour and go back to our fantasy hotel room. After about 15 minutes (that was 14 minutes too long), I finally interrupted him and said we'd seen enough. I'd cut the tour a few hours short, which meant we'd be skipping the motu picnic. He was cool about it and didn't give us any high-pressure sales pitch to buy black pearls, which I thought he would have done. He drove us carefully and safely back to the wharf, which only took 15 minutes since cut through the middle of the island.

MANEA SPA
We had some lunch at the hotel pool, went for a snorkel and then booked a Monoï Maitai massage (24,000 CFP = $257 USD for two) at the Manea Spa. It's a small, well-run, beautiful facility that's nestled in the shade of a coconut grove between a small lake and the lagoon. It was built from all natural materials in pure Polynesian style. The tranquil spa offers up a typical menu of services for face, body and hair but many of the treatments use local fruits, flowers and, you guessed it, vanilla for a fragrant and calming effect.

OCEAN SIDE
Le Taha'a could change its name to Fantasy Island because when it's sunny and clear, the place is jaw droppingly beautiful. The colors change with the clouds and position of the sun so the view never gets old. I must have taken a thousand pictures each day. One evening, Natalie and I went exploring and realized that the whole island doesn't belong to the resort. We later learned that the back half (the ocean side) has a couple of modest weekend homes owned by locals. Getting there is about a 12-minute, eerie and quiet walk. You don't hear anything except the sound of the giant land crabs scurrying back into their holes. We went down to see the sunset, which is stunning, but back there can be kind of creepy since there's no one around and the path to get there is deserted. It's so different from the resort because it's not groomed. You almost feel like you are in an episode of Lost and you're the star! I scared the heck out of Natalie when I suddenly "disappeared" on her but reappeared when she went booking down the path! Le Taha'a Private Island & Spa, Tel: (689) 60 84 00. Rack rates begin at 95,000 CFP ($1,012USD) but you can get much better deals by going through a tour operator or my travel agent. I use Jean-Louis Delezenne from FlyTahiti.com. He's basically Mr. Tahiti. He's a French guy who lives in L.A. but has a house in Moorea and knows and loves the islands so much it's contagious. Jean-Louis' email is meherio@yahoo.com.

TIP: Be sure to put bug spray on when the sun goes down.

VIDEO
Here's a two-minute Johnny Jet video of my trip to Taha'a. We also have all the Johnny Jet videos ever made on YouTube.

NEXT WEEK
We've saved the best for last: Bora Bora. Stay tuned.

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Note: This trip was sponsored by Tahiti Tourisme.

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